Easy Bagels

I didn’t think bagels would be so easy, but they REALLY are. You can start the dough early in the morning and have bagels by lunch. Or if I were more motivated… get up at 3 am, have them ready for breakfast!

And motivation aside, since my KitchenAid mixer sounds like a jet engine taking off, I don’t know if my family would appreciate the 3 am wake up… even for bagels. (more…)

Continue ReadingEasy Bagels

Hand-Molded Chocolate Houses for Christmas

Chocolate house making at Christmas has been a tradition that I started about 30 years ago and have since shared with my children. Well, technically they are ‘chocolate candy coating’ by Merckens or Ghiradelli… but I’ll get to that soon!

They’ve gotten plainer (believe it or not!) over the years. I used to make them to sell and then after I started having kids, I only made them for friends and neighbors who were


Continue ReadingHand-Molded Chocolate Houses for Christmas

Assassins Wanted

The CIA has three candidates for an assassin position: two men and a woman.

On the final day of testing, the CIA proctor leads the first man to a large steel door and hands him a gun. “We must know that you will follow our instructions, regardless of the circumstances,” he explains. “Inside this room, you will find (more…)

Continue ReadingAssassins Wanted

Sweet Dinner Rolls

Sweet Dinner Rolls (aka crack rolls)

These sweet dinner rolls are fondly referred to by friends and family as the ‘crack rolls’ because they are highly addictive and can cause fights for the first one… another one… last one, etc.

As you can see at the top of the photo, a roll has already been stolen before I could even take one. REALLY GUYS?!

I mostly make little round rolls, but you can (more…)

Continue ReadingSweet Dinner Rolls

A rare evening out…

My husband and I were dressed and ready to go out for a lovely evening of dinner and theater.

Having been robbed in the past, we turned on a ‘night light’ and the answering machine, then put the cat in the backyard.

When our cab arrived, we walked out our front door and our rather tubby cat scooted between our legs and ran inside. Because our cat likes to chase our parakeet we really didn’t want to leave them unchaperoned so my husband ran inside to retrieve her and put her in the back yard again.

Because I didn’t want the taxi driver to know our house was going to be empty all evening, I explained to him that my husband would be out momentarily as he was just bidding goodnight to my mother.

A few minutes later he got into the cab all hot and bothered, and said (to my growing horror and amusement) as the cab pulled away:

“Sorry it took so long but the stupid bitch was hiding under the bed and I had to poke her ass with a coat hanger to get her to come out!

She tried to take off so I grabbed her by the neck and wrapped her in a blanket so she wouldn’t scratch me like she did last time. But it worked! I hauled her fat ass down the stairs and threw her into the backyard….she had better not sh*t in the vegetable garden again.”

The silence in the taxi was deafening…


Continue ReadingA rare evening out…
Read more about the article Looks like surgery is needed…

Looks like surgery is needed…

Riley's sorry not sorry

Actually, this DOESN’T need a ‘Whodunnit’ caption… I know whodunnit–Riley dunnit. He murders every stuffy in the house.

Uninsured Rabbit
Uninsured Rabbit

Wesley got a new stuffed lovey at Jennersville Pets & Friends yesterday along with a second one (a cow, now in witness protection) at half off.

The worst is that Riley (more…)

Continue ReadingLooks like surgery is needed…